Starting this weeks blog post started out difficult for me. I have a huge family all of whom have had their own type of influence on my life. I could have written about 10 letters and another 8 or 9 emails to everyone lettering them know how much they mean to me and in what way they have influenced me. I had a very difficult time narrowing it down to my final 2 people. I had the hard choice of deciding who had a greater impact on my life. I have both my parents who have shaped me in their own ways, then there is my aunt and uncle who took me in when living with my dad was no longer a good situation. Then there are my cousins, all 15 of them, how do I narrow it down to 2. I also have 3 siblings, who in their own way have given me direction in my life.The two people that I ended up choosing were my brother and my aunt Sue.
The letter to my brother was a very special one, my brother was killed 2 years ago. So I knew that there wouldnt be a letter in return, but I felt that it was necessary to write him a letter telling him how much of an influence he had been on my life and how he is still. The letter to Aaron was heartfelt and I knew it would be hard to get my thoughts down on paper. I got a chance to tell him what has been going on in my life and how much I have missed him. Writing a letter that will never be answered is hard, you ask questions that you’ll never hear an answer to, you can share with them what is going on in your life but they’ll never actually know, you think that they will hear what you are saying but its not gonna change the fact that they are gone. You write a letter that doesnt need a stamp or even be mailed. I wrote this letter for myself, and I like knowing that I can sit down and write a letter to him whenever I am missing him or just that I need to talk to him.
The email that I sent was a lot easier to send, I sent the email to my Aunt Sue. Talk about an influential person, you look up that word in the dictionary and there would be her picture. She is one of the most loving, caring, protective women that I have ever known, and I am very glad to say that she is my aunt. In the email I was very informal, which is how I always am with my family. We are not a formal family and if someone were to write a formal letter to one of us it would be weird. I got to tell her how important she has been in my life. If I have a problem with anything or need advice on anything she is the person that I call and talk to. She is always ready to help any of us kids when we need it. She took me in during my freshman year of high school and gave me a place to stay. Her house will always be my home even if I havent actually lived there in 3 years. I was able to express to her how thankful I am that I have her in my life.
The letter to my brother was very long in length, somber in some places and funny in others, I wanted my letter to him to be very expressive. The letter to my aunt was not as long, and it was straight to the point. I know that she doesnt have a lot of time to sit down in front of the computer and surf the net. The response I got back from my aunt was what I thought it would be. She just told me that she was proud of my and that she will always be there for me whenever I needed her. We are better at expressing our emotions to eachother in person, we are a very animated family and even using emoticons wouldnt be able to convey how we are truely feeling about eachother.
In Postman there was a part in the reading that stated in the middle ages that people listened to the authority of their religion. I think that the same could be said when talking to your elders, I know I take in and listen to things that my aunt and uncle tell me from their past experiences. We may have greater access to information these days than they did in back in the middle ages, so we dont have to rely on one source for our information like they did back in the day.
While we may have more resources available these days, as pointed out in Postman, does it really make any one of them more valuable then the simple, precious lessons of our elders? I speak this question “out loud”, so to speak, for some food for thought for myself, as well as others. I am finding that more information does not necessarily make it more valuable or credible.
On another note, I find it interesting that you chose to write your brother, even though he has moved on. I can relate, however, with both parents gone from Cancer now, and with a two precious dear people to me that were more like family than my own parents, as well. I did not even think to write them a letter, although sometimes my thoughts drift towards are memories together or at times, I may speak out a comment or two towards them, as if they may somehow be able to hear or feel me, at least in spirit. That is, if that is even possible. A part of me likes to think it is very possible.
I think you were brave to dig into your emotions towards your brother. By the nature of your blog, I wonder if you are continuing to write these letters. There was a part that stated “you could write whenever you wanted to…”, if I recall correctly. This emotional release could prove very helpful to you, I imagine. I know from my own experiences that writing has been a great help in many ways, through many trying times in my life. It helped me to blossom to the “butterfly” that I am today, despite the “cocoon” that I once lived in for so many years as a youth.
Thank you for sharing such an inspirational and touching story!
Joy
sistoj@onid.orst.edu
By: Joy on February 4, 2009
at 4:22 am
That’s very cool that you wrote to your brother, I just wish I had thought of that. I too lost my brother 5 years ago this month and think I might do the same in the next couple of weeks. Even though the response won’t be there, I think I’ll find a similar cathartic experience you felt…Thanks for the inspiration
By: Daniel Leach on February 4, 2009
at 7:24 pm